He works from 9 to 5 and then...

[velouria]

My current goal in life is to seduce the new guy at work into marrying me. He's under 95 and male, not the norm, so I fumble all over my goddamn self every time he speaks to me.

This afternoon, he ambled over to my cubicle to ask me what I was reading. I struggled desperately to find a sophisticated way to explain that it was a US magazine chronicling Jessica Simpson's journey into hefferdom, but could not find the adequate words to do so. In all honesty, I was only looking for whatever words wouldn't make me sound like Juliette Lewis in The Other Sister or Juliette Lewis in anything, really. I did not succeed even remotely.

He got around to casually asking me how old I was, so I take this to be a declaration of his love. What else? For this reason, I must find a legitimate excuse to go into his cubicle tomorrow. I have not come up with anything thus far, but I do have an outfit for the occasion.

Comments

[jonn68.livejournal.com]

:D

[velouria.livejournal.com]

let's wait until a murder/suicide is off the table before breaking out the smiley faces.

[jonn68.livejournal.com]

Well, ok.

I just like to live vicariously through other people's flirting.

[granting.livejournal.com]

Picture of you in said outfit please.

Also, congratulations. He does sound like he's flirting with you!

[velouria.livejournal.com]

you're still a pervert.

[granting.livejournal.com]

What? that's far from perverted.

[botrinks.livejournal.com]

Un-plug his keyboard:

If he struggles, furrowing his brow in a vein attempted to understand the situation...then calls the i.t. crowd, he's thick.

If he struggles but looks cute, go be a hero.

If he plugs it in straight away, nonchalantly walk past & whisper with a smile: tomorrow it's the breaks on your car.

[velouria.livejournal.com]

the way the place is laid out, i wouldn't even be able to gauge his reaction unless i just lurked around creepily.

[botrinks.livejournal.com]

do that! It's such a turn on.

...or maybe you should just get to know him. Ask lots of questions, that way he does most of the talking. Bonus.

[botrinks.livejournal.com]

P.S. Good luck!