velouria: (Default)
velouria ([personal profile] velouria) wrote2004-02-29 11:04 pm

Been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding.

This girl at work today. Looked about my age. She and her boyfriend approached me to inquire as to the whereabouts of birth control. I told her. 5 minutes later she comes back. "Can you help us over there?" she asks. I'm not sure if I successfully masked the wave of discontent that washed over me, but I said "sure" and followed her over there. She started out with that "where is the birth control" question again. I did a general arm wave in the direction of the huge wall of contraceptives directly in front of us. But she wasn't having it. "No, birth control."
"Condoms?" I ask.
At this point, her boyfriend gave us his intellectual contribution to the conversation: "No. No condoms."
So while I was sneering at him, she grabs the contraceptive films holds them up to me and says, "I can stick this on me?"
I told her no. No. It goes inside you actually. To which she replied, "So you can't even feel it, right? The box says you can't feel it."
"I don't know. I assume so. I've never used them before." And after I'd somehow been conned into saying whether or not I'd used vaginal films as a means of contraceptive in my lifetime, I started looking around for the MTV Boiling Point crew. Surely if I put up with her crap for two more minutes, I would make a hundred dollars and could thus go home for the night.
But no crew emerged. Instead she told me about a patch she'd seen on TV which prevents babies. Did we have it? I explained that one has to see a doctor to be given such a magical baby preventing patch. What about the pills? Doctor, I says.
So finally they left with their films. I am upset for two reasons.
1. I did not receive a hundred dollars for having to deal with them.
2. Films aren't very effective against pregnancy. Especially when the woman using them wishes to stick them on her ass.
THOSE TWO ARE GOING TO MULTIPLY.

[identity profile] for7676.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 03:16 am (UTC)(link)
I can barely believe the idiocy of some people. It's scary sometimes, to the point where I wish that Darwinian Theory was more prominant in our societies. Weed out the weak, only the strong will survive.

MTV actually does stuff like that? I thought all that was broadcast was Britney, NSYNC, and other obnoxious trype..?

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)
yes. my favorite episode involved someone following a transvestite around blaring "dude looks like a lady" on a boombox.
but hello, nsync are so over.

[identity profile] brain-matter.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 06:12 am (UTC)(link)
i would have told them that pulling out is the most effective method of birth control

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 10:40 pm (UTC)(link)
i suggested a murder/suicide.

[identity profile] slothraspet.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 08:12 am (UTC)(link)
hey, i'm not sure how i ran across this journal, but this story is hilarious. man, people are dumb. just wanted to let you know that i'm adding you.
-sarah

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 10:44 pm (UTC)(link)
duly noted.

[identity profile] jaimeee.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 09:29 am (UTC)(link)
yesterday while at job number two, i had a customer who kept repeatedly buying ONE thing at a time and paying with a ton of coins. around 5 times, she bought something, each time only buying ONE wine glass, ONE shot glass, ONE tumbler, etc.

what's funny is that i was waiting for my 100 dollars, too.
i don't call it job "number 2" for nothing.

xxx
j

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 10:50 pm (UTC)(link)
there is never a better time to break a shot glass and stab a person than this.

[identity profile] ruxpin-exe.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 11:29 am (UTC)(link)
AND THEN SHE WENT HOME AND MASTERBAUTED FURIOUSLY
laffo

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-01 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
i'm seriously banning you from my journal until you learn to spell masturbate.
and when you do, i see no reason for you to post the word in my journal. so i will just ban you for all eternity.

[identity profile] ruxpin-exe.livejournal.com 2004-03-11 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
I would be sad ;__;

[identity profile] ruxpin-exe.livejournal.com 2004-03-11 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
And do you know how aware I am that I spell it wrong? Every time I spell it I think "heres another word I'm spelling wrong" but I've been spelling it wrong for so long I can't ever hope to fix it.

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-21 02:42 am (UTC)(link)
this one's easy though.

mas tur bate

[identity profile] velouria.livejournal.com 2004-03-21 02:16 pm (UTC)(link)
blargh. you're making it all french and shit.

[identity profile] ruxpin-exe.livejournal.com 2004-03-21 11:31 pm (UTC)(link)
oh colleen, you silly goose.