Take me to bed or lose me forever.

Why do I stumble home semi-drunkenly at 1 something in the morning and think that it's a good idea to engage in conversations with persons I downloaded portions of the Top Gun score off of on my file-sharing software?

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I wanted to tear my face off by the end of the encounter, which is the point that he informed me that this was just a brief synopsis and that he could elaborate if I wanted.

How is it possible for someone in possession of the instrumental version of Take My Breath Away to be such an enormous dildo?